The Truth about Relationships
- What are the factors contributing to such a high divorce rate?
- Given the many books and experts on relationships why does the trend continue to grow?
- What does that say about our lives and how we live them?
- Why is it that women are increasingly the main initiators of divorce proceedings?
- Why do some men feel unappreciated in their role as the main breadwinner?
- Why are affairs said to be occurring in 80 % of relationships?
- Is attraction the best tool to choose a life partner with?
- Does the concept of romance help or hinder our life?
- Is there such a thing as true love?
- How would we know if we had found true love?
- What is it that we are missing?
Life is about evolution. Divorce has become a panacea to tensions that arise in relationships. One of the main challenges for people entering relationships remains the propaganda that we are fed in movies, books and magazines. They often present an unrealistic "perfect" picture of relationships - the perfect relationship does not exist.
It's time to take responsibility for our relationships. We need to learn how to negotiate, communicate and give choices rather than seek control over each other.
Few of us are taught at home or at school how to have a successful relationship.
Don't expect someone else to complete you or to change to suit your expectations.
Relationships involve negotiation to create a unique norm that suits each couple individually. The first step is to be able to know your own "non negotiables" and to be able to discuss these with each other. If we don't, we drift with the relationship and revert to our human nature - seeking control in order to feel secure. This type of security is often mistaken as love. The problem is that this marks the start of tensions within relationships.
Stress and tension in relationships are natural but we must learn skills and tools to negotiate an acceptable outcome otherwise affairs, break ups and disconnecting emotionally results.
Men and women use different styles to communicate and we need to understand how to bridge the gap. Upskilling in this area avoids misunderstandings and further tensions.
Self awareness is crucial to a satisfying relationship. Life is about learning and growing individually. Where both partners seek to be independently secure within themselves first, their relationship will be mutually satisfying.
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